The Reality of High School Relationships

Alexis Lunsford

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The truth about high school relationships is that they will be very challenging and can cause heartbreak. But the learning experience and memories make them worth it.

There’s no guarantee that someone will be in your life forever. There is no guarantee that they are the person you thought they were and there’s no guarantee that they will make you happy or even hurt you. 

There is one guarantee, though. Those who do come into your life are there for a reason, whether it’s for a short period or for many years of your life. 

Whether it’s clear or just leaves your head foggy with thoughts, everyone plays a role in growing as a person. Your youth is your time to grow mentally, find what you like and don’t like and figure out your emotions. 

High school is a jungle of social dilemmas, a pool of judgment and the home of emotionally immature teenagers who just want to be loved. Relationships are prone to be one of the first emotional roller coasters you experience. 

Although at the time, relationships and breakups may be a burden, you’re going to look back and appreciate that it happened because of everything it taught you. 

 

One- 

Highschool relationships teach you how to react to your emotions.

Disappointment is highly guaranteed when it comes to relationships. As a teenager, your head is filled with unrealistic thoughts of a true gentleman coming and swooping you away. You wish of being given constant attention, smeared with consistent gratitude and being whisked away as he holds the door for you. Or for the boys, a true lady who will smother you with appreciation, build you up with support and bombard you with gifts. In reality, it’s a battle of time, feelings and effort.

Although you will have moments of happiness, hopefully lots of them, there’s always going to be a moment where you wish you could hinder your ability to talk, lose the ability to point your finger or just glue your feet to the floor. In all honesty, it’s your reaction which exaggerates the problem at hand. You’re able to voice your opinion, maybe not during certain moments, but it should definitely be a right and not a privilege. 

If your actions allude to your boyfriend or girlfriend becoming flustered, or you watch the problem get out of hand or bring up other problems all at once, it would be time to reevaluate your choices during times of emotional distress. Wear your heart on your sleeve when it’s necessary but do not erase it when you feel anything but happy. 

That’s what you learn in high school. You’re growing up from being babied in middle school and moving on to an independent life where your reactions could consequently take away more than just your phone. You need to use your indoor voice if you dislike how much they play videogames or if they smiled at the wrong person. 

 

Two-

They teach you the priority of family, friends, work, school, sports and yourself.

High school is where you find yourself, discover how you like to spend your time and how to treat the priorities that are shoved in your face as you come closer to adulthood. Whether you’re a freshman or a senior, there’s most likely going to be an obstacle, like school and work, that will completely disrupt your time with your person but is necessary to maintain your growth as an individual. 

There’s no lie when you’re head over heels for someone that you may want to drop everything you’re doing just to be with them at that very moment. In the hypothetical situation that you do that, let’s say with school or sports, that would be just temporary happiness and excitement. In all truth, the moment your partner leaves your side and you’re alone, the stress is going to catch up and the work will build up. You’re now behind because you put someone in front of your success in life. 

Now what a lot of teens do not understand is that there are priorities with no time limit. There are priorities that hide in the shadows because they want to see you happy. These priorities will stick by you, whether it’s for the rest of your life or just for a short time, but they will be there.

There’s no schedule for your friends and family. You don’t get a grade for being with them, nor do you get any awards. It’s just simply the satisfaction of moral support and quality memories that you get to carry around with you for the rest of your life. You never know how long they’ll be around, so why would you spend all your free time with a boy or a girl you might end up never talking to again?

Being in a relationship in high school may take all your time. It might take every free moment you have when you’re not in school or at work. 

While it may be fun in the meantime, there are other people and hobbies that you’re leaving behind. It teaches you the importance of having multiple priorities at once and that priorities don’t need to be the people and tasks around you.

You’re the most important person to take care of. You, yourself, should be the greatest priority. If you’re stressed about having to juggle so many things at once,  take time for yourself to do what you need to do to get rid of the stress. 

Being your own individual and knowing what is important to you is a greater key to happiness than any relationship. 

 

Three-

It teaches you that not everyone is going to be around for the long run.

Temporary happiness may be a thing of hours or years. You’re happy in your relationship, understandable. You want this feeling you have and the person that gives you this feeling to last forever, understandable. You’re afraid of being hurt and having to start new, completely understandable. 

It all makes sense why highschoolers think their boyfriend or girlfriend will be the ones they marry. They’ve never felt this excitement or happiness before, and they want it to follow them for the rest of their lives. What they haven’t experienced yet, like previously stated, is the lack of emotional structure, which may make those who don’t know how to handle their feelings, wary of how to act or simply what to say. Even prioritizing, we’re talking about teenage boys who want to play video games, hang out with friends and focus on sports compared to the girls who want to spend all their time with their boyfriends simply because they love them so much. 

It’s complicated having a relationship in high school. Especially when it’s over. It’s true heartbreak. Your first relationship is over, yet it’s a blessing in disguise. 

If you truly think about it, if this were the person for you, why would it be over? If this was the happiest you could be and the same for the other person, then why would it be done with? You’re not even an adult yet. How could this be the love of your life? 

People come and go. It may give you mixed emotions, but it’s the reality of life. They’re there for a reason, though. They’re there to teach you life lessons and have memories to look back on. 

It teaches you that although people leave, you can still have respect and be happy for people that may have hurt you. It teaches you how to treat people, how to be so close to someone and see a future with someone. But it also teaches you that not everyone stays.

Life changes, and so do people, but it’s all for the better.